Nasruddin

Missive #600 Published 21 November 2025

114. Buying an Elephant

Nasruddin decided he was going to buy an elephant, and he knew it would be an expensive purchase. Since he didn’t have enough money, he went to his richest friend to borrow the money.
His friend, however, refused to give him the loan. “You’re not thinking clearly, Nasruddin,” he said. “Elephants are expensive to buy, and they are also expensive to keep. If you don’t have the money to buy an elephant, how will you be able to afford to house the elephant and feed it?”
“You don’t understand,” said Nasruddin angrily. “I came here for a loan, not advice.”

Missive #595 Published 14 November 2025

Nasruddin had a dream. In his dream, an angel was counting golden coins into Nasruddin’s hand, one at a time. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight… finally the angel had counted out nine coins.
“If you could give me ten coins,” Nasruddin said to the angel, “I would be able to pay all my debts.”
The angel then looked at him angrily and disappeared.
Nasruddin awoke from his dream. He looked, and saw there were no golden coins in his hand.
“Come back, angel!” shouted Nasruddin. “Please come back! I’ve thought it over, and I’ll take the nine!”

Missive #592 Published 7 November 2025

112. Nasruddin and the Baker

Nasruddin owed the baker money, so when the baker saw Nasruddin on the street, he said, “Come with me!” and he led Nasruddin into the bakery.
“Look!” the baker said, pointing at the account book. “You owe me three silver coins.”
Nasruddin nodded, looking at the account book. “I see my brother-in-law owes you five,” he remarked. “I was on my way to see him just now; I’ll get him to pay also!”
“Excellent!” replied the baker.
“He owes you five, and I owe three,” Nasruddin said. “So you can give me two coins now, and that will square things.”

Missive #587 Published 31 October 2025

Nasruddin had been at the dentist all morning, and his wife wondered what was taking so long.
Finally, Nasruddin walked through the door, grinning happily, his mouth wide open.
His wife gasped in shock. “Nasruddin!” she exclaimed. “What has happened to your teeth?”
“Well, you know how much that dentist charges,” Nasruddin replied. “He wanted a gold coin to remove my bad tooth. A gold coin! It’s outrageous. So we haggled and haggled, back and forth, back and forth, and I finally persuaded him to take out four more teeth. So I got five removed for the price of one!”

Missive #582 Published 24 October 2025

110. Nasruddin and the Wool

Nasruddin owed his neighbor money. “But don’t worry,” Nasruddin said. “I’ve got a plan!”
His neighbor looked doubtful. “Do tell!” he said.
“I planted some bramble bushes outside; you probably saw them. And you know how the shepherds drive their flocks down the road on their way to the pasture…? The wool from those passing sheep will get caught on the brambles. I’m going to harvest that wool, sell it, and that’s how I will pay you back.”
Nasruddin’s neighbor burst out laughing. “I don’t think you’ll ever pay me back,” he said, “but at least you keep me entertained!”

Missive #579 Published 17 October 2025

109. Nasruddin’s House with Many Windows

Nasruddin had built a new house, and there were many windows, big and small, in every wall.
“I’ve never seen a house with so many windows!” said Nasruddin’s neighbor.
“That’s my own design,” Nasruddin explained. “This new house has twenty windows! My old house had just one.”
“Why so many?” asked the neighbor.
“To stay warm in winter!” replied Nasruddin. “My old house became much warmer when I closed my window in the winter. Now when winter comes, I have twenty windows to close, so the house will be twenty times warmer. I won’t even need to light a fire!”

Missive #575 Published 10 October 2025

108. The Warmth of a Candle

Nasruddin made a bet with his neighbor. “I’ll stand in the snow with only a blanket for warmth. If I last all night, you feed me; otherwise, I feed you.”
Nasruddin stood all night in the snow. “I won!” he shouted.
“No!” his neighbor protested. “You used the candle burning in my window for warmth. I’ll come over tonight to eat that dinner.”
When the neighbor arrived, Nasruddin explained the soup wasn’t ready.
The neighbor waited.
And waited.
Finally, he went into the kitchen and saw a pot suspended over a candle.
“Imagine that!” said Nasruddin. “The soup’s still cold.”

Missive #568 Published 26 September 2025

106. Nasruddin the Architect

“Our house is so crowded,” Nasruddin’s neighbor complained. “We can’t stand it anymore.”
“I can help,” Nasruddin said. “Will you obey my advice exactly?”
His neighbor nodded.
“Bring your goats, chickens, and donkey into the house.”
A week later, the neighbor told Nasruddin, “That just made things worse!”
“I know,” said Nasruddin. “But now, send the donkey outside.”
“That’s better,” said the neighbor a week later.
“Now send the chickens back out.”
“That’s much better,” the neighbor said next time.
“Now the goats.”
Nasruddin’s neighbor came back smiling. “Thank you, Nasruddin!” he said. “Our house is so much bigger now!”

Missive #565 Published 19 September 2025

105. Nasruddin and the Bears

A rich man had invited Nasruddin to go with him on a bear hunt. Reluctantly, Nasruddin accepted the invitation.
A few days later, he returned from the hunt beaming with happiness.
“How did it go?” his neighbor asked him.
“It was wonderful!” Nasruddin replied with a smile.
“How many bears did you kill?”
“None!”
“How many bears did you chase?”
“None!”
“How many bears did you see?”
“None!” said Nasruddin happily.
His neighbor stared at him in confusion. “That is why it was wonderful!” Nasruddin explained. “I don’t mind hunting bears if there are not any bears to be found.”