Nasruddin

Missive #444 Published 14 February 2025

74. Nasruddin and the Porter

Nasruddin needed to hire a porter to take home four large sacks of grain he had bought at the market.

Just outside the market, he found a porter with a wagon.

“Good day, sir!” said Nasruddin.

“Good day to you!” replied the porter.

“How much will you charge to take me and my purchases to my house?” Nasruddin asked.

“That will be four copper coins for you,” said the porter. “No charge for the purchases.”

Excellent!” said Nasruddin as he started heaving the sacks of grain onto the wagon. “You just take my purchases home, and I’ll follow on foot.”

Missive #441 Published 7 February 2025

73. Nasruddin and the Tailor

Nasruddin went into a tailor’s shop. “I’d like to try on a pair of trousers.”

The tailor gave him the trousers, and Nasruddin tried them on.

“They’re not quite right,” he said, giving them back to the tailor. “I’d like to try a jacket now, please.”

Nasruddin liked the jacket very much. “I’ll take it!” he said, and then he began to walk out the door.

“But wait!” shouted the tailor. “You haven’t paid!”

“I exchanged the trousers for the jacket,” Nasruddin explained.

“But you didn’t pay for the trousers!”

“Of course not!” said Nasruddin. “I didn’t want the trousers."

Missive #438 Published 31 January 2025

72. Nasruddin’s Ladder

Nasruddin was fond of fruit, and he was also fond of raiding his neighbor’s orchards.

One night he had just lowered a ladder into someone’s orchard in order to raid it, but the orchard’s owner caught him in the act.

“What are you doing with that ladder?” the man shouted at him.

“Are you talking about this ladder?” asked Nasruddin. “Well, to tell the truth, I’m just trying to sell this ladder.”

“You can’t sell a ladder here!” the man replied.

“I beg to differ,” said Nasruddin indignantly. “A ladder can be sold anywhere! Do you want to buy it?”

Missive #433 Published 24 January 2025

71. Nasruddin the Nightingale

Nasruddin had broken into an apricot orchard and climbed a tree.

As he was stuffing his pockets with apricots, the owner of the orchard discovered him.

“What are you doing up in that tree?” the man shouted.

Nasruddin said nothing.

“I repeat: what are you doing up there?”

“Are you talking to me?” asked Nasruddin.

“Yes, you!”

“I’m just a nightingale,” said Nasruddin. “This tree is my home.”

“If you’re a nightingale, sing!” said the man.

Nasruddin sang. He sang very badly.

“You don’t sound like a nightingale!”

“I’m a young nightingale,” said Nasruddin. “I’m still just learning to sing.”

Missive #424 Published 10 January 2025

69. Nasruddin and the Apple Tree

As he was riding past an apple orchard, Nasruddin was seized by a desire for apples, so he led his donkey up to one of the trees.

Then, standing on the donkey’s back, he reached up and grabbed hold of a branch.

Just as he was about to pick an apple, though, the orchard’s owner came running up. This startled the donkey, who bolted and left Nasruddin dangling from the branch.

“Get down from there!” the man shouted. “I’m going to have you arrested for stealing my apples!”

“I’m no thief,” Nasruddin shouted back. “I just fell off my donkey.”

Missive #419 Published 3 January 2025

68. Nasruddin and the Thief’s Shoes...

Did you happen to notice that the drone scares that were front page NEWS for about a week suddenly just went away. I don't know if the drones went away but the lame stream media is no longer reporting anything about them. I suspect it was a government operation trying to drum up some support for a war against Iran. When that proved to be a dud they just let it fade away. Now we have 'terrorist' attacks in the United States again. This time by men that were, or are, in the Army; just like the leftists said would happen. We need more laws against anyone that is now in or has been in any branch of the US military — look for it to come.

Missive #415 Published 27 December 2024

67. The Thief and Nasruddin’s Rooster

Nasruddin heard squawking from the henhouse during the night. “It must be a thief,” he thought, and he ran outside, where he found a man creeping away from the henhouse.

By the light of the moon, Nasruddin could clearly see a rooster’s tail-feathers sticking out from under the man’s cloak.

“Give me back my rooster, you thief!” shouted Nasruddin.

The man stood up straight and answered back, “Sir, please believe me! I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about.”

“And do you think I’m going to believe you,” Nasruddin replied, “or am I going to believe the rooster’s tail-feathers?”

Missive #411 Published 20 December 2024

66. The Thief with a Wagon…

A friend wrote recently about a decrease in his Heart Rate Variability (HRV) which caused me to do some research. I didn't know much about it except that it was the 'pause' between heart beats. What I found out was that my Polar Pacer watch, through Polar Flow, provides that data for me. From what I have read the best time to measure HRV is when you first get up in the morning. Since I have been wearing my watch at night with the continuous heart rate option turned on I'm capturing that data.

Missive #406 Published 13 December 2024

65. Bags of Loot

Nasruddin’s wife woke him in the middle of the night. “I heard burglars!” she whispered. “I saw them leaving their bags of loot in the garden, and then I heard them come into our house. It sounds like they’re in the kitchen.”

Nasruddin leaped out of bed, pulled on his clothes, and began to climb out of the bedroom window into the garden.

“What are you doing?” his wife asked.

“I’m going to sneak outside,” Nasruddin whispered, “and steal the loot from other people’s houses while the thieves waste their time looking for something worth stealing here inside our house.”